So Yoga huh.
Mind you so is the algorithm (yes I speak tech)(if it has been explained slowly, admittedly). Anyway, the algorithm is the thing that sends what you have been thinking about to your computer and phone. Ads, posts, that sort of thing. You know on social media. It just knows, either because it is amazing. Psychic. Or, it is spying on you. Who knows. The algorithm is quite happy to spy on me. It must get quite bored.
Obviously, what you have been thinking about is already in your head because it is your head and in your head they are your thoughts. They haven’t yet found a way to change that. Have they? I suppose they could soon add ad breaks to your head but that is called watching tv that isn’t the BBC so we have that already and there is no need to invent it. Never sure what the difference between an ad and click bait is and to be frank I am not interested in learning. If I like something I click on it. However ill advised. Let’s just leave it there.
Anyway. Back to yoga
It’s been around a while. Like 5000 years or so. Nobody really knows. It has just always been there. This johnny come lately internet bollocks might see it as literally a dinosaur. Ancient, mystic and not relevant. But in 5000 (or so) years one wonders will the internet have stood the test of time. Sure there have been times when it (yoga) has been more popular than others, when it has caused division and occasionally people who use it have exploited others. But it isn’t really any of those things. It is good for you, comes in many forms and you can just enjoy it without becoming obsessed. You could say that about the internet. Except most people would not recognise that description. Because the internet seems to exist just to channel hate, cause division and enable people to be rude to each other without ceasing.
So yoga huh.
I must have been thinking about yoga because it is everywhere. Or it is just everywhere, algorithm or not. Anyway I keep coming across articles about it. What it means to some star or other, who does it, the type they swear by, the place you can go to do it and what you can wear to do it in. What it can give you, teach you or how it can change things. I won’t go on. I am a fan. Of yoga. I love it. But you won’t be bored by me telling you about my sort etc etc. I don’t need to. Just read this (I love it when people read my stuff)(so you are already making me feel the love and therefore a sort of guru)(you see this yoga thing is so easy). Once you have read it the algorithm will send you a positive flood of information about it. Whether you like it or not.
But wouldn’t it be fab if yoga was in fact everywhere. As you can do it sitting still, standing on your head or getting out of breath. But in a new sort of world it could be everywhere. Imagine the algo having an off day and it just really being everywhere. But it doesn’t really matter. Imagine everyone (ish) actually doing it. Downward dog in the queue in Sainsburys. Chanting in the bar. Namaste to you too sir in McDonalds. Balance and breathing at the school gate. People not speaking instead of disagreeing (also known as keeping your own counsel) and smiling and saying I get your drift instead.
So Yoga. So much gentler. The world takes a breath and smiles at itself. How great would that be. Now I realise these things are actually in my head. But I wonder if they can escape to the algorithm. Who will then send yoga into the actual world. Instead of just my phone.
Ok there are days when it would be great not to actually do it. To not ache at all rather than because I had stretched. To be calm and yogi without having to try. I would love all this AI stuff to do it for me. I could have a gin and a fag while the artificial me was doing yoga. Reaping all benefits whilst otherwise engaged. Yes I know that isn’t how it works but I wish one of those millennials would invent that. It would be the quick route for a better behaving world.
Now I like doing it – yoga is great. But having thought it I hope I will now be sent ads for products I don’t have to use but because of AI I will get the benefit and can just do what I want all the time and be really well. Maybe the internet will stand the test of time. In the meantime I will keep yoga ing away and sending you my calm happy thoughts by myself and hopefully the algorithm will step in too.
Does anyone else think the world is really mad. Or out of control. Or just mad. Or is it just me.